Loss And Gain (Essay Competition - around 500 words)

I've surpassed the limitation. And though the result is still not yet known, I was desperate to post up something for you guys to read with first. I'm a little tight with my own scehdule. Sorry! :D

I will update Masquerade as soon as possible. :D

So here it is - the original name was : Donate an organ, Save Life.

But i prefer it to be called Loss and Gain. :D

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It was the hardest day of my life.

As my husband, Jack, almost swallowed by odd assortments of medical instruments, looked at me in the eyes, I almost felt his soul melting within me. Those kind eyes would be the last thing I would never want to forget. His personal doctor came in with a paper in his hands. 

“Thank you for agreeing to donate his organ to other people. It really does make a difference,” He looked at me, and then my husband, “You will save many lives.”

But he will never save his own life, I said to myself.

I glanced at the dearest person in the world besides my parents and siblings, and saw him nodding back in reassurance. Holding his hands in mine, I let a tear traced its way down my face, feeling for his last warmth before God takes him back home.

I began to recall our memories together as his squeezed my hand softly, his eyes never leaving me. “Come on, smile a little,” He said, voice very weak. “Oh, Jack,” I sobbed.
I hated the fact of losing the most important part of his organ to someone else but me. 
I blinked away a tear, sorrowfulness biting into my heart. 

“Susan,” His breath was a little weak back then. “When your maker wants you home, you should be home.” His words were like a thousand knives penetrating my heart. He squeezed me a little and looked at me again. “Susan, I love you.” 

“Thank you for being my wife, thank you for giving me a chapter of your life, and thank you, for everything you’ve done for me.” 

I nodded in silence. “And also, thank you for loving me.” 

His lids blinked a little, as if he was tired. “Sleep, if you’re tired.” 

“But I’m afraid I could never open my eyes again to see you,” I saw horror in those dark brown eyes, once confident but now tired and scared. He had spoken my fear too.

“I’ll wake you up, alright?” I reached and closed his lids with my hands.

“Susan, I love you…” his voice faltered away.

I sobbed as I felt his grasp softened. 



Jack’s had donated his heart to a teenage girl who has congestive heart failure. I had to send him down to the surgery room. It was as though he was only sleeping, he could wake up any time. 

The red fluorescent light flashed on, the words ‘surgery room’ on it pained me.

Our old memories haunted me. I wanted him back so badly. I wanted him by my side, holding my hand, patting my head softly. Where would be the shoulders for me to rest again? Where would be the heart that will only beat for me? 

I had a lot of questions. But they will never be answered.


12 hours later, the surgeon came out, pulling down his mask and gloves. The girl’s family circled him and he gave them a smile. “We are successful in the surgery, she will recover very soon if the body doesn’t reject the heart.” 

The family thanked the doctor, smiles revealing in their faces. Happiness flooded the room suddenly. The mother turned around, gratitude and happiness both lifting up her face, held my hand in hers softly. 

“Thank you so much. And,” She paused; eyes suddenly filled with tears, and then continued, “I’m sorry for your husband’s departure. He is a wonderful man.” I was tired from all that had happened, I wanted to share her happiness together but I wasn’t in my best condition. I wanted a shoulder where I could rest, and when I knew that shoulder was gone, my stomach turned. 

“He is a wonderful man, very wonderful.” I told her and lifted my lips as high as I could.

Then, I went back to my house, where the presence of Jack that will no longer be found. As I opened the closet and saw the neat suits hanging in there, it was as if Jack would come back any time and wear them to work again.

I wrapped one of his favourite shirt around me, his smell still lingering on it.

A few days later, when packing up his things to give out to the others as he had wished, I found a note in the pocket of one of his suits.

“When you are looking at this note, I might have left you. Darling, I do not mean to leave you so soon. I’m so sorry. But I know you can live without me. Life is for living, live for the rest of your life happily for me, for your family and friends. Alright? 
Love, Jack.” 

I imagined him writing this, brows locked together thinking of the best words to convey his messages to me. In the past few days, I smiled for the first time. Crying and laughing for the same time. It may not be a long note, but those words filled the emptiness of my heart as though Jack had read this aloud to me.

“Thanks God for giving me a husband that is so wonderful.” 



A few years later, I knocked into a girl on the street. I didn’t know who she was but it seemed like she recognized me. “Are you the Jackson Lee’s wife?” She asked me and I nodded slowly. “I’m the girl whom he donated his heart to,” She told me with a smile. I was surprised, that girl was frail looking and small framed, but this girl right now in front of me was healthy and youthful. Miracles, I remarked.

“Thank you.” She thanked me again, as I waved my hands in the air softly. “You should thank my husband,” I smiled. I had learnt to accept what people feel about Jack without feeling awkwardness. We had a little talk and then we left for our own works.

As I continued walking on the street, gazing at the infinity stretch of the so blue sky, I felt as if someone was watching over me. I recalled the girl’s happy and healthy face, and Jack’s note packed neatly in my drawer. I was proud of my husband, and I was happy to have had him as my husband. 

Heading into blood donation centre, these words surfaced my mind. 

Donate an organ, save life.


I want to save the others like what Jack had done, and I want to see the happy smiles of the others. A nurse approached me, “Please sit down.”  

And so, I donated my blood.

-the end-

Sucks, right. ==